Dear Grief, Your Armageddon Is Coming

(Kate Motaung wrote an e-book entitled Letters To Grief. It is just .99 cents on Amazon. Here is one of my letters to grief, which will be linked to Kate’s blog.)

Dear Grief,

It is hard to believe it is over six years since you moved in with me after Joe’s unexpected passing. You are also the only one with whom I have danced cheek to cheek since then and  you are not a graceful dancer. Besides my toes, you also stepped on my heart. Then you dipped and twirled me at the wrong times and places as we waltzed to life’s music.

I learned to cope with you while moving forward with my new life. I also did reconnaissance work and learned your ambush tactics.

Oh, how I despise your ambushes! You attack me with the power and might of a nuclear bomb. Usually, I am able to anticipate your attacks and launch counter-measures.

However, I must applaud you for the exceptional job you did nuking me at Joe’s youngest niece’s wedding reception. I anticipated your appearance but was unprepared for the intensity of this nuke, which made a hot August night, even hotter.

The type of nuke you chose was music and the song was out of this world – Aerosmith’s I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing from the movie Armageddon. All the couples made their way to the dance floor where they slowly swayed to the music, while getting lost in the moment of holding each other close.

And there I sat alone – the wallflower.

No one with whom to dance.

No one to wrap their arms around me, holding me close enough to hear their heartbeat.

It brought back memories of the junior and senior high dances, only back then I had hope for a future full of dancing cheek to cheek with a husband.

Now-a-days men my age prefer women in their 20’s and 30’s, therefore as far as I know I will never again feel sweet surrender as a man holds me close while dancing the night away.

But wait…

There is hope.

Because God will one day dry every last one of my tears.

Afterwards, hopefully He will allow Joe and I to once again hold each other close and dance cheek to cheek – on top of your grave, Grief.

‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

Revelation 21: 4

Your Armageddon is coming Grief – are you and your best friend forever (BBF) Death ready?

No Love Always,

Michele

14 comments

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  • What a powerful story, Michele. I’m so very glad you wrote and linked up, as hard as it may have been. Thank you for sharing this glimpse into your everyday dance with grief. May the God of all comfort be your source of comfort and strength as you wait for that day when you will one day dance again, cheek to cheek with your husband. Grace to you, now and always.

    • Thank you Kate for your e-book and the opportunity to link up. I would not have made it this far if it were not for God’s grace. My journey has not been easy but God has blessed me along the way. Thank goodness the grief ambushes do not happen often anymore. Wishing you lots of joy and dances with your husband.

  • This post made me hold my breath all the way through because my throat got all choke-y. This means that I love your post as much as I hate it (okay, I don’t actually hate it but I do detest the grief it’s about). Bring on grief’s Armageddon.

  • This is beautiful! I believe you and Joe will one day dance cheek to cheek again. Until then may you be wrapped in Gods loving arms. Thanks for sharing your story!

  • Beautiful, and I am so very, very sorry for your loss. Your grace and courage are a beacon.

    And please know this…if you don’t mind my saying it, from a male perspective…men our age who prefer women in their 20s and 30s are idiots. I used to be a college teacher, and I got really, really tired of the “winks”. Date a student? I know people who did, but I’d rather enter a monastery.

    And talking to a 30 year old is kind of like talking to a cat.

    If I had been at that wedding, I would, with my wife’s full approval, have asked you to dance with me.

    Because NO ONE should be left standing alone.

    A bit late, and again, I hope you do not mind me asking…but may I have this dance?

    Your acceptance would honour me, and place me in the presence of greatness. I mean that, from the core of my being.

  • A beautiful post. Just beautiful.