It was a cool August night when I found myself standing on the edge of a cliff while attending a wedding reception. The cliff was mental and unfortunately I was not alone – Aerosmith was there.
The reception was for Joe’s youngest niece, the last one to get married and our flower girl, so the day was filled with lots of emotion. It was another event Joe should be here to witness but he was not, at least not that we could see.
I am sure he was there in spirit but how were his niece and her new husband suppose to feel a hug or hear him say “Congratulations?”
Needing Arms Again
It was getting late and I had an hour drive ahead of me so I said a tearful goodbye to the bride, my niece-in-law and my other niece, the maid of honor. It was then I really got teary eyed because the DJ played Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing” from the movie Armageddon. Numerous couples made their way to the dance floor and held each other close while dancing cheek to cheek.
I was overwhelmed by the feeling of needing arms wrapped around me, holding me close. I started to lose it and after saying goodbye to my niece, I grabbed my silver purse and walked out with tears streaming down my face.
I even forgot where I parked my car. I finally found it and started the drive home. Upon my arrival an hour later, I let Rommie out, gave her a midnight snack and with tear-filled eyes, crawled into bed.
It’s been almost 6.5 years since Joe moved to heaven. However grief still ambushes me once in awhile – which is normal. I knew this was going to be a tough day but it was tougher than expected. While I did not want to cry, I just let the tears run down my face as getting grief out is healthy.
When grief ambushes you at a special event years after your loved one’s passing – just “Roll With It Baby.” Then the next day, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and move forward with life, cherishing the joyous memories from the special event.
Below are the lyrics to Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing.” Now you know why I went off a cliff.
I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing
I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
Well you’re far away dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
And just stay here lost in this moment forever
Well, every moment spent with you
Is a moment I treasure
I don’t wanna close my eyes
I don’t wanna fall asleep
‘Cause I’d miss you, babe
And I don’t wanna miss a thing
‘Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I’d still miss you, babe
And I don’t wanna miss a thing
Lying close to you
Feeling your heart beating
And I’m wondering what you’re dreaming
Wondering if it’s me you’re seeing
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we’re together
And I just wanna stay with you
Just stay in this moment forever, forever and ever
I don’t wanna miss one smile
I don’t wanna miss one kiss
Well, I just wanna be with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just wanna hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time
Don’t wanna close my eyes
Don’t wanna fall asleep, yeah
I don’t wanna miss a thing