You Can’t Slay The Grief Monster While Drinking Beer…

or any other type of alcohol.

TGIF

Well it’s the weekend, time when people come home from work and open a cold bottle of beer, uncork a bottle of wine or sip a glass of Scotch.   There is nothing wrong with that as long as it is in moderation and you are NOT grieving.

Numb

A lot of grieving people use alcohol to “numb” the pain.  This is not a good idea.

When Joe suddenly moved to heaven, I was hurting.  I was feeling excruciating pain – both mental and physical.

I knew enough to:

  • Attend the Griefshare support group at church
  • Attend the Women’s Renewal at church the following year

and

  • To stay away from alcohol!

The Grief Monster’s Weapon Of Choice

Alcohol is a depressant.  It is the grief monster’s weapon of choice to cloud your thinking, impair your judgment and get you to a deep a state of “woe is me.”

The “buzz” gotten from too much alcohol will only numb your grief for a short while.  Then when you sober up, the grief will still be there with more intensity because you are in a weaker state.   Thus you more depressed about your loved one’s passing.

My Choice

Joe passed in 2008 and I did not decide to have the occasional glass of wine until 2010. I wanted to recover from my grief journey and knew even an occasional drink would not help.

It is now 4 ½ years later and still only have a glass of wine maybe every 6-8 weeks, sometimes not even that frequently.  This infrequent glass of wine is not because I am still in despair over losing Joe, it is just by choice.  There is a lot do in keeping up the house, transitioning to a new career and playing with Rommie.  I do not need nor want alcohol to get in the way of those activities.

Instead, Café Mocha made in my Keurig has become my drink of choice – but only in the fall and winter.  It’s too hot to drink coffee in the summer.

How Laying Off Alcohol Helps The Grieving Process

So if you are grieving the loss of a spouse or other loved one-lay off the sauce, this means even the occasional drink.

It will help your grief recovery because you will be tackling the grief monster head on and fully alert.

When you are fully alert and in control, the grief monster does not stand a chance.